Thursday, June 17, 2010

Broken umbrellas and worrying less.

Today Aria and I went for a walk along the beach in the pouring rain - and I do mean pouring. The kind that is coming at you from multiple directions - the kind that needs more armour that just one umbrella and a raincoat. Maybe a portable tin shed would be getting close... I truly felt that Aria and I needed to get outside today - I've been feeling my vitamin D stores fading along with the sun, and the muscles in my cramping legs were craving the sea water, so I just thought - so what if it's storming outside. Lets go Aria!

After becoming predictably saturated and having to repeatedly manouvre an umbrella that was intent on remaining inside out, I became rather discouraged. Visions of indoor warmth crept into my icicled brain and my frozen legs and feet ached. I could feel the arthritic pain of fibromyalgia clawing at my joints and began to feel fearful that I had triggered off a painful episode. Silly me!

Then began the self bashing... "I shouldn't have come out here," "Why do I always make life hard for myself?" "This was a ridiculous, stupid idea", "Aria's probably hating this", "I should've known we'd get saturated", "Why did I do this?"... you get the picture. We can be pretty harsh with ourselves sometimes and I'm a master of this when I let myself go unconsciously.

After a fair amount of 'Melissa Bashing', a small voice on my back piped up - just audible over the wind and heavy rain.

"Mama wet... Ah well, no worries.... wub oo" (love you). 

In one instant the beauty that surrounded me became obvious. Coming from Aria's mouth - the innocence and purity brought a tear to my eye! I got to thinking - Some things just aren't that complicated. It's simple... Life doesn't need to be so serious! The ability of the young child to go with the flow and move through life living in the now is just magical.

So now my day has not become about aching legs, drenched clothes, pain, fatigue and broken umbrellas. Today is about letting things go, worrying less and loving more.


With love and light


softearthart said...

It is good to let things go, a good cleansing with rain can be therapeutic to the soul,just like your last words, love and light Marie

Anonymous said...

:-) What a beautiful story!

indigomumma said...

beautiful words Melissa. And isn't it just so humbling the quintessential little words from our little Rainbows that just seem to bring a new perspective of Ah-ha! :) Smiles and love to you both xxx Glad your rainy day was filled with sunshine! :) xxx

Catherine said...

What a beautiful post, Melissa! This is so very true! I have found myself in the same situation many times. Children are such amazing teachers...

I have read many times in the last month about fibromyalgia and about people find an amazing cure for it with a low-fat raw vegan diet (80/10/10 diet). It might be worth looking into this (one more thing, I know!).